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Welcome to the Ask Dr. Eldritch Webcomic!
Are you new to this comic and want to know what's going on? Below is a synopsis of the Story So Far, with hyperlinks to the different points in the storylines. You can read the summary until you're ready to make with Teh Funny and read the comics themselves. OR... Click here to Start at Comic #001! Click here to go to the Latest Comic!
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SYNOPSIS: For those of you who don't know of Dr. Eldritch, he's the world's foremost advice columnist for the strange and unusual. He answers questions from superheroes, arch-villains, mythical creatures, master spies and ordinary people in extraordinary situations. Of course, Kari didn't know any of this when our story begins...
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Beginnings: Kari is greeted by Dr. Eldritch as she moves into the Mansion. His introduction is interrupted by Trevor the Troll. Kari faints upon first seeing Trevor, but quickly recovers, assuming that it's all a practical joke. She's visited by the ghost of her Great-great-great-grandmother Clara, who gives her an ugly amulet of protection. Kari's still unconvinced of the dangers of the Mansion, and plans a Halloween Party when Eldritch is gone. Everything's fine until one of the guests drugs Kari's drink, and assaults her in her bedroom. Kari uses the amulet to summon Eldritch, who rescues her. The next day, Eldritch hexes Derek and release him to suffer until he can control his inappropriate behaviors. Great-grandma Clara visits Kari again, and reveals that the Mansion contains an erratic interdimensional portal, which allows creatures from multiple universes to pass through.
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New Friends: Trevor discovers a small robot stealing items from the kitchen. As a Troll, he's about to deal harshly with an intruder, but the robot begs to be allowed to stay. Eldritch agrees, as long as Ping obeys the first two Laws of Robotics (making the third optional). Kari exploits this agreement, as Eldritch is accosted by a strange, armed woman in the lower sub-basement, who demands to know who he is. Trevor appears and grabs her. Eldritch reveals that he is the caretaker while the owner is away. Val introduces herself and shows that the owner lets her stay in the Mansion when she's in this dimension, so Trevor releases her to chase a flying sprite. Val meets Kari as Kari's making Ping sing Madonna tunes while wearing lingerie.
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The Eater of All: Searching for the sprite, Trevor finds a mysterious swirling black vortex in the upper hallway. He notifies Eldritch. They learn that the vortex is the Eater of All, an extradimensional being who is about to consume the universe, and is being a jerk about it. Eldritch attempts to eradicate the Eater with a phase shifter. This fails. With the Earth about to be destroyed, Eldritch improvises. He has Kari don a cheerleader outfit and they trick the Eater into a set of recursively-nesting Klein Bottles. This does work, and everyone celebrates with ice cream.
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Ping's Cooking, Easter Week, Val's Secret Life: Ping tries to be helpful (or something). Val reveals that she's been genetically altered, using cat genes. Eldritch meets Byron, a Lycanthromimus who works as a decorative item in the living room. Kari walks in on Val having sex with Ping. Eldritch is blasé about that, but Kari is oddly upset.
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Charades & Zombies: A game of Charades is interrupted by a zombie attack. How the residents came to be playing Charades is shown in a flashback: First, everyone else becomes aware of Byron. Trevor and Ping mess with him, trying to lure him into the basement so Trevor can eat him. Val plays a prank on Kari: Putting Sudbury, an immortal talking skull, in her toilet. Eldritch refuses to join in, and insists that everyone play Charades so they'll learn to get along. Then they all fight the zombies. Trevor, Ping and Byron play poker for their post-battle celebration, while Kari and Val get drunk together. Kari wakes up in Val's bed. Kari has flashbacks to her assault, and Val reveals that, while they did kiss, nothing else happened.
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Unfiltered: Professor Boffin and Darla show up, giving Kari a Thought Transducer (which speaks what people are thinking). Kari learns a bit too much about the thoughts of the other residents. Darla reveals that she's actually Professor Boffin's mother, despite him being much older than she is. Kari misunderstands when Eldritch is alone with Val in her room.
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DRM Blues: Ed the Tentacle Monster visits. Val departs suddenly, leaving only a note for Kari. Trevor buys music CDs, but when Ping tries to play them, the built-in DRM malware takes over his operating system. Eldritch calls on two Geeks to help fix Ping. Two lawyers show up, uninvited. One insists that the EULA they agreed to when Ping tried to play the CD allows them to confiscate him. The other is going to sue them for the illegal music downloads done by the unknown Belgian hacker who turned Ping into a zombie. Trevor takes them to the basement so he can eat them. The Geeks fix Ping. Eldritch wraps up with a thoughtful speech on balancing the rights of corporations and consumers, but Trevor and Ping have learned nothing from this experience.
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Life In The Mansion: Trevor and Ping try to build a rocket. Everyone participates in National Novel Writing Month. Barry and Randall, two Magical Helper Elves, deal with their relationship. We have a Very Eldritch Christmas.
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All About Kari: After a New Year's Eve party, Kari has sex with Ping. She confesses this to Eldritch. He is called away by Professor Boffin, leaving Kari in charge of the Mansion. The Bulgeraeines arrive and reveal that their entire race may die if Kari doesn't let them to offload through the mansion. She's about to agree, when Yates and Malki show up. They reveal that the Bulgeraeines have left a trail of ruined planets, and Earth will be destroyed if they're allowed to settle there. Kari, faced with a dilemma, sends the Bulgeraeines away, probably to die. Malki gives her a guilt trip for not granting them a quick end, and leaves. Val returns, and while not initially sympathetic, Kari seeks comfort with her that night. Trevor, Ping and Byron discover that Kari spent the night with Val. When Val tells them that nothing happened, she reveals to Trevor that she had sex with Ping. Trevor is stunned. Kari tells Eldritch about her decision, and Eldritch reminds Kari that Life is Not Fair. Trevor forgives Ping for his fling with Val.
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CAAD: Ping organizes Cybernetic-American Awareness Day, demanding equal rights for cybernetic beings, but anti-war protests upstage his march on Washington. Kari reveals to Val that she'd been attracted to Darla, which isn't as well-received as expected. Eldritch learns about the relationship between Sudbury and Nahina, the sock-stealing Blue Fairy.
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Big Changes: Val spends time with Kari. A mysterious and corrosive pink goo appears in the Mansion, and is named Charlene. Val and Kari watch a romantic movie together, which leads to them kissing. But Kari goes off to bed alone. Val seeks satisfaction from Ping. Kari discovers the two together, and reveals that she and Ping were intimate. Eldritch searches for something to nullify Charlene. Kari discovers her wardrobe covered with goo, and moves out of the Mansion. The Charlene problem gets worse, but a solution is discovered at the last minute. Everyone celebrates with ice cream.
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Moving On: Kari rents a basement storage room to live in, with three stoner housemates. Val discovers that Eldritch has put out a personal ad. Ping's friend K-Gor comes to visit, making Trevor jealous. K-Gor disappears. Kari tries to meet new people. K-Gor returns, swearing revenge on Trevor. Eldritch goes on a first (and last) date. The Time Being, an anthropomorphization of Time, who is constantly depressed and nobody but Eldritch can see, appears in the kitchen and won't go away. Kari considers new careers, without any success. Finally, after an unusual encounter with a "zombie," Kari asks Eldritch if she can return to the mansion. This delights Trevor. However, Kari's reunion with Val is strangely low-key.
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A New Direction: Kari reveals that she wants to learn what Dr. Eldritch knows. He declines. Trevor gets a girlfriend, Evisceratina. Kari's efforts to convince Dr. Eldritch to teach her continue, and she asks Val for help. Eldritch finally agrees, if Kari can win a challenge. Through cleverness, Kari triumphs. Kari's apprenticeship, however, is just cleaning things. Meanwhile, Eldritch meets himself from the Perfect World. Val has a chat with Eldritch. After that, Eldritch apologizes to Kari, and says he will train her properly. Trevor and Evisceratina break up. The Eater of All seems to have returned....
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Pageantry: The mysterious entity turns out to be a relative of the Eater of All, who likes to be called "Princess Sparkle." She demands to compete in the "Cutest Princes in the Universe" Pageant, which is quickly assembled. Trevor is crowned First Runner Up, and Princess Sparkle is declared the winner. Life returns to normal. Kevin turns Evil. Kari reveals that she's still bothered by losing the pageant. A robot housekeeper arrives. Dr. Eldritch learns that she is built for more than just cleaning. Kevin stops being Evil. We meet Robby and Bobby, the Evil Scouts. Kari learns more about her apprenticeship. The annoying Dr. Zastro arrives, demanding the return of Ping, but he is outsmarted. Kari learns to shoot.
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After discussion, Eldritch agrees to a pageant. And then after more convincing, Dr. Eldritch starts Kari's hand-to-hand combat training. Kari finally starts to meet the Fae Folk in the mansion. After a software upgrade, Helen has a few problems, which lead to dealing with the zombies in Tech Support. Dr. Eldritch is reluctant to damage Helen, with a surprising revelation. Fortunately, things work out okay. From that, Kari wants to learn how to walk through walls. Then, Trevor is kidnapped by Ninjas! It turns out to be Zastro, who demands the return of Ping (aka "Brobot"). Dr. Eldritch negotiates a monetary ransom, and he and Kari set out to Beaverton to deliver it. On the way, he tells how he met Trevor. Trevor is recovered, and they return triumphantly to the mansion. We then learn that Robby and Bobby are ghosts. The inhabitants of the mansion have interesting dreams, including one shared by Val and Kari. Although Kari expects the monster from her dreams to appear, he doesn't. Yet. Kari has a costume change. Dr. Eldritch proposes to Helen, who says "Yes," and she puts together a wedding in a week. Dr. Eldritch tricks Kari into thinking she's psychic, but she quickly learns that she isn't. She's upset, but Grandma Clara snaps her out of it. Kari decides to throw herself into her studies. Trevor and Ping decide to genetically engineer dinosaurs from chickens, with some unfortunate results.
Then, the zombies at Zorbletech talk yet again about eating Brent. Dr. Eldritch meets Guy Random while getting coffee. Dr. Eldritch and Kari help a puppeteer with a problem. Two burglars break into the mansion and meet Robby and Bobby, and Trevor. Val heads out on an adventure. Then Kari meets Guy Random, too!
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Awesome, huh? Now that you've read this, click here to join in the story in progress!
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Last Revised: February 3, 2023
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©
2003-2007 Evan M. Nichols
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DISCLAIMERS & LEGAL NOTICES
Ask Dr. Eldritch is for Mature Audiences. May contain adult themes, adult language, images of violence, nudity, sexuality, and progressive thought. And maybe hot lesbian sex. All names and characters depicted are fictitious and any resemblence to any organization or person living, dead or undead is purely coincidental. All trademarked materials are copyrighted by their respective owners. All other imagery, concept, characters and writing © Evan M. Nichols, unless otherwise noted. All fanworks sent to Ask Dr. Eldritch/Evan Nichols will be regarded as gifts unless otherwise specified. Legal ownership of actual images will be freely transferred to Evan M. Nichols, with the provision that creators shall be consulted in the event of use beyond showcasing. Fanworks submitted by the artists and authors will be treated with utmost care and respect. In return, the creators agree that they no longer possess sole interest in the managing of their creations. Gift art will not be used for commercial purposes without the consent of the creator(s). Evan Nichols retains the right to display or remove images from the galleries as he sees fit. Design and images are licensed for use only by Evan M. Nichols. Theft of this design is strictly prohibited, and offenders will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law.
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